HEROIN IS SAFER THAN FANTASY SPORTS - SAYS FDA

I had my two fantasy baseball drafts in the last week or so. I feel like I am coming down of a serious glue-huffing high.Read More.

I AM AN AMERICAN AND I DESERVE A BUCKET OF SODA

I like to drink my soda out of a hollowed out Watermelon. And that's okay.Read More.

APPLE SUCKS

If Apple were cult sponsored Kool Aid it would probably fail to kill anyone. And then you would have to bring it to the Apple store and some dip-shit named Taylor would throw some strychnine in it and charge you $400.Read More.

DANCE FADS ARE NOT FUNNY

Dance fads are about as funny as the time your Aunt Belinda crashed her car into the Shop Rite storefront and was in shock trauma for 12 weeks.Read More.

NOBODY NEEDS AN "ENTOURAGE THE MOVIE"

Entourage sucks. Making a movie out of something that sucks is grounds for public lashing.Read More.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

I HOPE GREEN TREE HOME LOANS GETS SUCKED INTO A BLACK HOLE

Dear Lying Assholes--

Why has my mortgage payment not been processed yet??? The horrible customer service representative that I spoke to last Monday told me the payment would be proceeded NO LATER THAN 7.5.13. So not only was she an awful human being, but she also lied.

I don't expect a response from you because your customer service is terrible, but I am planning to log complaints with the BBB if this continues to happen. I have a lot of free time, and I plan on making as many complaints as I see fit. Maybe it will solve nothing, but it will definitely make me feel better and hopefully sway people from EVER considering your bank as a service provider for anything, including cashing in spare change, which I assume you would screw up too.

My mortgage was sold to you not even two months ago and I've already had more grief with your terrible bank than I had with Bank of America over 4+ years, and Bank of America is THE WORST. So what does that tell you?

Thanks for living up to your very bad reputation. It's nice to know I can count on something nowadays.

Drop Dead.